golden fields

As I was driving home today I looked out over a field of oats and grass and saw the wind blowing it sideways then back again. I could see the different shades of the greens and browns in the grass and it took me to a place that my mind goes to relax where I am walking through a field and there is no evil and no snakes. I see my self in shorts, a tang top, hair down and barefooted. I feel happy as I walk through a field of tall golden grass, as I look about I see cows grazing on hills afar. Their is a light breeze and I can feel it through my fingers as the tall oats brush my hand as i stroll up a small slope.I reach the top and a big smile forms on my face as I see my friends and family living and lost ahead sitting at picnic tables eating freshly cooked chicken,home grown corn on the cob and other mountains of foods. They are all happy and there is no pain or suffering.
Thinking of this place brings tears to my eyes because I miss all of them so much.

May 1st!!!

Yay today is May 1st, I am so happy. I counted out how many actual school days are left and their are fourteen days left!!! Then I have fifteen days left of work, I can't believe it is getting so close!!!! Hope everyone has a fantastic day today!!!! :)

Getting anxious

I didn't sleep to well last night I tossed and turned and kept wondering when morning was going to come. My mind was turned off, but my excitement has been put underneath a blanket to keep away the anxiety and stress that will come with it.Last night that excitement couldn't be contained any longer because tomorrow is May 1st and I will have twenty-three more days left of school. I have this excitement that I have not had since I graduated high school! These last eight months while I have been in school has allowed me to find bits and pieces of my self that I didn't know existed. I believe that God has helped me tremendously through it all and I am much a obliged to him for it all.I know that I have a few more weeks left but I am so happy that I am once again about to graduate school!

I saw some movies recently and I have to say that only one out of the four I saw was good and heart touching. It is called "War Horse" its a good movie not to much language or blood but oh such a good horse story. Then I also watched the "Rum Diary, Happy feet, and Contraband". Rum diary was boring and not my taste, for some reason I thought it was supposed to be funny but it wasn't at all. Happy feet was kinda cute but not as good as the first one at all. Contraband did not have enough action for me and needed a better cast and script. It is just not worth watching.

Night dreams

I really hate it when I am sleeping so peacefully but then the dreams start, and they are not just every day oh so happy dreams. It is like I am in so much of a deep sleep that I cannot awake from it. So the only way I can get it out of it is to wait until the very end of the dream to pull myself out of it. Last week I had one that was so vivid and in such a deep sleep it was almost painful to stay in it. Finally after it was over I somehow was able to wake my self up to me shaking and sweating while my mind is racing with fear from the clear video I just lived in. A nightmare of course, caused by Rapid Eye Movement (REM) which is the brain being active as if I were awake. Also rapid breathing and heart rate speed up even more when this happens. I believe my brain pulls things that happened early that day and puts them into a very vivid dream. When I was little I use to have nightmares all the time from just watching a action movie that barely had any gore or killing in it and barely six hours later I am in a full on nightmare with things that my brain used from the movie but only with people who are in my actual life. The dream I had very early this morning was crazy how my inner mind had pulled from a documentary that I was watching last night on wolves living in a closed off zone that has radiation still in the soil in Russia. Some how my mind used that and turned it into a full on war zone with radiation with my family in it. It was stressful how we were on the run from everyone and it never ended until I finally got my self to wake up. Scientist have come up with some conclusions on how the brain works while we are sleeping and also how dreams come to pass but they still don't know enough to actually know why. Only God can answer what they might mean or if they are meant to make us think and change our ways.

Well I have just received an A on my farm machinery midterm and I am very happy with it. I also have only four more weeks of school left. I can barely contain my self I am so happy!!!

new ideas

So my friend has talked me into going on a healthy diet, and to do a workout every day and today is the first day. For breakfast I had 1 egg scrambled with veggies containing: asparagus, broccoli, onions, and parsley. I hope to start feeling better and to build my immune system back up to what it should be.
My birthday went very well I had fun with my friends and family back at home and I am so glad that I spent the money to go home.